Welcome!

Dog owners often look at their furry companions and wonder, "if you could only talk." The truth is most dogs can, it's just you humans are too busy picking up our poo to listen closely.

Well, now's my chance to voice my opinion for all humans to understand. I see a lot living with four women in a Manhattan apartment whose lives are just as involved as any Hollywood starlet. The mingling of their distinct personalities produces constant mayhem. These women work hard, date plenty and party late (don't tell 'em, but one time I got a contact high when they lit a doobie during a barbecue). I've met more than a dozen male suitors that have come and gone. I've witnessed tiffs over trivial issues like who left crumbs in the peanut butter. I've eavesdropped on heated conversations between jilted roommates and "evil bastard" ex-lovers. I've seen more boobs than I prefer, but I'm sure the general public wouldn't mind a description to create their own visual. And since I'm a canine, I have enhanced sensibilities. I can smell sex, even if the sex happened in Brooklyn.


In Lucy's Speaks, you'll read my real thoughts on the shenanigans that go on in this place. It's one thing to read about how "ohmigod, I SO totally like this guy I met at Crobar last night" from their online diaries, but you'll get the gossip that girls wouldn't disclose to anyone but sweet, unassuming me.

Heh. Dem bitches won't know what hit 'em.