Countdown

It's five days unti Bee's birthday. No I haven't gone shopping yet. I haven't the slightest idea what she wants.

Oh, who am I kidding? She wants the same thing every year. She wants a MAN!!!

Fortunately, she'll have two to take her out to make her feel special. The first is her friend Andre (I'm out of letters of the alphabet and clearly I can't use Aye again. And why would I use something like Queue or Zee or something that doesn't even include a letter in his name. Fuck it.)

Andy is like Bee's brother. He is always there when Bee feels like going out, and he's even cooked for her once or twice (what a good guy!) Unfortunately, Bee only returns about a third of his request for her to go out with him (laziness, not disinterest). They have not slept together. They probably will never sleep together since they're more like brother and sister. Oh, and he slept with one of Bee's former roommates after she set them up.

But he volunteered to take my momma out to dinner at a very nice restaurant the night of her b-day. That's a gentleman for you.

After dinner, Bee's very tall, good looking friend A, the one that babysat me that Thanksgiving weekend, is throwing a party for her at his apartment. He's got a great view of the fireworks that will be popping off around 9PM, just when Andy and Bee will be finishing up dinner.

And then the night after, Bee will be wined and dined by a gentleman that has been around for the last six months but is probably not going to be around for the next six. He's a smooth investment banker type that Bee met while out partying one night around Christmas, and though he's got the big time bank account, the big time car and the big time muscles, he also has big time baggage. Which is why Bee has dialed back their relationship to platonic. Of course, this was after racuous hooking up for the past six months, the kind of sex only partaken in romance novels and R-rated HBO movies.



Despite the good times, Bee is letting him go. Looks like she is getting wiser with age.

(Oh. You may be wondering why I didn't mention this fella before. Well, he only came to the apartment three times. And each time, I was locked out of the room, so I couldn't report on what was going on. I suspected sex, because the last time he was here he walked across the living room in a towel and showered. But I didn't want to make a big deal of it because Bee would often be so melancholy about the whole deal afterwards. But I gave you the Cliff Notes. Consider yourself caught up.)